Chapter 55

I don't know what happened to me. I went from having no appetite at all to craving food all the time. But food was not all I craved. I glanced up at Lucian from where I sat across him on the table. He was eating calmly in comparison to me who was trying to stuff everything at the same time in my mouth.

My body ached as I studied him in silence. Even though I was sore I wouldn't mind going back to bed and do last night's deed all over again.

"You are looking at me like that again." He smiled.

Stop smiling, I wanted to yell. His smile was not making it easier for me. I stuffed the grilled meat in my mouth and tried to focus on how it tasted instead of him.

Lucian chuckled. "Eat slowly. You might get indigestion."

I cursed inwardly. Even his laugh was inviting.

What was wrong with me?

I felt different both physically and emotionally. I was very sensitive, whether it was to touch, taste or smell. My senses were heightened and my body felt stronger. I guessed it had to do with the pregnancy. The midwife had said something about feeling sensitive and emotional or be very craving. I felt all those things but I never thought it would be to this extent. I had to ask Irene.

Once Lucian left for work I went to Irene's room. She was sitting on the bed and knitting something.

"What are you doing?" I asked curious.

"I am knitting a sweater for the baby." She smiled.

I went to sit next to her. She had chosen a beautiful turquoise color.

"Isn't the color beautiful? Whether its a girl or a boy they can wear it." She explained.

"Yes. It's very beautiful." I agreed. "Irene?"

"Yes, darling."

"Did you feel different when you were pregnant? Like really different." I asked.

"Are you talking about the cravings?"

I nodded.

"Well, your body is changing. A child is growing inside of you so it's just normal to feel different. Things might taste and feel different. You might feel more sensitive both physically and emotionally. Maybe you get angry easily or sad. It's different for every woman."

I nodded again feeling relieved that it was normal but there was something else.

"Did you also feel stronger?" I asked.

Irene paused and then turned to me slowly. "Oh right. I forgot. Your baby is a demon, witch, and human. The human and witch side don't have side effects but the demon side does. You are probably turning."

"Turning?"

Wait! I was turning into a demon because of my child.

"Half-demon." Irene corrected. "You will feel more powerful and your senses will heighten. Trust me, everything will feel much better now when you are pregnant. Enjoy your time." She winked.

A blush crept to my face remembering that Irene was not only my friend now. She was my husband's mother as well.

"Well, I'll let you finish your work." I excused myself and left.

"I wish I could invite you, but you know my brother," Klara said apologetically.

"It's alright. I wish I could be there too. But I'll root for your happiness from here."

Klara and I had become very close and to our surprise, we weren't so different from each other as we thought. We had many things in common that we enjoyed and could chat and laugh about the whole day. I noticed that even Roshan and Lucian become close and sometimes they would just sit and talk. I was happy that Lucian found a friend in a demon so that he wouldn't feel alone.

I was also happy that he was slowly opening his heart for his mother. Sometimes I would find him sitting with Irene and having long talks. He had said that she was only teaching him how to use his witch powers but I could see that he enjoyed her company. Even Lothaire would visit sometimes but things didn't seem to go well between him and Lucian.

"Lucian. Have you forgiven your mother?" I asked one night as we lay in our bed.

"No. There is nothing to forgive. I think I knew it from the beginning but I just…"

I knew what he wanted to say. He had been in so much pain so he wanted someone to blame. He wanted to release his pain somewhere so that he wouldn't have to keep it inside.

I put my hand gently on his cheek. "Let it go, Lucian. You deserve to be happy. That pain and anger is your enemy, so don't let your enemy win."

He took my hand and kissed my palm. "I won't." He promised. "I want to be happy now."

"Yes. Let's live happily together."

"With our daughter." He put his hand on my stomach.

"Daughter?" I said surprised. "You want a daughter?"

Kings usually wanted a son. Someone who could carry on the line.

Lucian nodded. "Yes. I want a daughter that I can spoil. A son will only suffer."

"What if it is a son?" I asked.

"I'll do my best to give him a good childhood and protect him." He said.

"Whether it's a daughter or a son, they will be lucky to have you as their father." I ensured him.

"I hope so."

That night, despite craving something else I was content with just sleeping in his arms. But as soon as the morning came I was not content anymore. I felt like a wild beast ready to eat anything and everything. I knew I had gained some more weight but I didn't care. At least not when food was laid in front of me. But when Lucian was in front om me, I craved him.

I really tried my best to not jump on him every night. Sometimes I would succeed and sometimes I would not. I wondered if he thought differently about me now. Did he find me bothering maybe? Not that he showed any signs of that but I just found myself bothering sometimes.

"Do I look fat?" I asked Klara one day when she came to visit.

She studied me for a while. "You look voluptuous." She said.

"So I am fat?!"

"Nooo...It's not the same thing." She tried to explain.

"You are just trying to sound nice. I know you think I am fat!"Klara raised her brows surprised by how I acted. It was unlike me to get angry with people without a reason.

"Well I...I think you still look beautiful. I mean you are pregnant so you are not going to look the same." She explained calmly.

"I am sorry." I apologized. "But uhhhh….I want to eat something."

Klara laughed. "I thought you were worried about being fat just now."

"Well, I don't care anymore. Let's go eat some meat!"

Klara shook her head as she followed me to the dining room.

"So your wedding is very soon. Are you nervous?" I asked.

"Nervous? No. Should I be?"

"Well...I don't know. I was very nervous."

"Oh…" She said nodding as if finally understanding something. Then she gestured with her hand for me to lean closer. "I have already done it." She whispered.

Slowly I leaned back into my chair while trying to digest what she said. "You already did it?"

She nodded with a blush.

Of course. What was I expecting? Klara was not as shy or scared like me. She was adventurous and Roshan seemed like the type who knew exactly how to seduce a woman. With his looks, he probably didn't need to put in a lot of effort.

My gaze fell on her neck but her hair was down so I couldn't tell if he claimed her or not.

"Did he also…" I pointed at my own mark.

She nodded again. "Yes."

"How did it feel?" I asked unable to stop myself.

"It was a bit painful but very...pleasurable."

I agreed with her. "Did he only do it once?" I was curious since Lucian had done it more than once.

"Yes. But when the mark starts to fade he will get the urge to bite me again. That's what he told me." She explained.

I nodded now understanding why Lucian had bitten me again.